My biggest revisions for this section revolve around the relationship between Quinn and Abel. I need to establish the relationship more before plunging the reader into a huge backstory. I also need to rework some of the ‘romantic’ dialogue, as it feels/reads too scripted. One of the biggest things regards Quinn’s death. I need to clarify how long it’s been since Quinn died in order to keep Abel “stuck” in the age/mindset he was when he died. Some smaller revisions would be to dial up Abel’s grief and to plant seeds regarding Abel’s personal burdens.
Author: Alex (Page 5 of 21)
The last few chapter of Neil Gaiman’s The Ocean at the End of the Lane really brought everything together. I think one of the things I like about Gaiman’s writing is that he paces events and character development well. Specifically, I feel as though the pacing is slow enough where it allows the reader to speculate on what happens, but also fast enough where we don’t have to wait long for gratification. The description Gaiman uses within the last chapters is also really great. I found myself loving the mysterious/fantastical elements he incorporates into the bucket scene and even giving a parallel between Lettie and Ursula using the sail-cloth imagery. I was also pleased with how the narrator’s character arc developed. The narrator definitely loses any shred of childhood he had during Lettie’s “death”, but the Hempstock’s ability to gift him his childhood back is a device that allows the story to begin. I think the major question of Gaiman’s work revolves around the idea that “ignorance is bliss”, which it seems to be. As soon as the narrator remembers, he also forgets and moves on with his life. It’s a tale that reminds us to continue living and that the our future is the greatest gift of all.
The biggest piece of advice that I would give to an in-coming student studying literary fiction would be to keep an open mind. Not everyone will agree on writing advice, so when you get critiques on your short stories, you’ll need to figure out what advice works best with your writing style. You’ll also be scared of feedback at first, but eventually your confidence will grow. Lastly, just keep writing!
The two chapters in Bird by Bird focused on plot and dialogue. Plot is something that I tend to struggle with, since I feel like I have so many ideas and so many different directions that a story could go in. Sometimes, it’s really overwhelming to sift through all the possibilities, but Lamott’s advice is really helpful. Characters push the plot forward, and if the possibilities that you come up with don’t fit in with what the characters would do/say, then the story wouldn’t be believable. I liked how Lamott really pushed the idea of character within plot, as sometimes I feel like people discuss plot without discussing character. In all honesty, I feel a sort of reverence to the characters I write, because without them there’s no story. Sometimes you just have to write and let the characters decide where the story goes. Lamott discusses momentum, and while this idea is frustrating, she has a point. Things won’t move quickly when you write your first draft and it’s incredibly slow and painful, but you just have to keep going. The dialogue chapter was interesting, as I feel like I struggle with writing good dialogue sometimes. It’s one of the biggest things that I focus on as a reader. If the dialogue is unnatural or if it just feels forced, then I won’t enjoy the story, no matter how well-crafted the plot or the characters are. Lamott also discusses how each character is different and has to speak a different way. I think I struggle with this the most. I feel as though all of my characters tend to speak the same way, even if they aren’t in the same story.
My second story, Six Bullets, was reviewed on 12/1. Initially, I was pretty nervous about this story. I wanted to challenge myself and write an action sequence that didn’t lose momentum throughout the narrative. I also wanted the fight scene to not be the “main” story. Based on the feedback I received, I think I might’ve tried to pack too much into the story. A lot of the feedback was about character motivation, such as why Reyes was checking for the ring during a shootout, and other concerns about technical things, like Reyes not having extra ammo. I think for my revisions in the future, I need to focus on revising the technicalities of this story. There were a lot of things that took out the readers, most of which could’ve been avoided if I had written the story carefully. One of the biggest notes was that I either need to heighten the tension and story surrounding the shootout or I need to heighten the tension/story surrounding Reyes and Penny. Personally, I might lean towards the latter, though I’m not quite sure. If anything, I might take out some of the exposition portions. This review session was a little harder than the last one, mostly because I was happy with a lot of the things that I had written. I want to try and revise this story, but I also feel like it doesn’t quite fit the form of a short story. Regardless, this peer review was helpful, especially since I need to work on clarity and technicalities within my stories.
How did he end up here? Arthur sat on the ground, his thighs sinking into the wet soil beneath him. Well, they would have, if Arthur had still been alive. He felt nothing beneath him, nothing at all, except for a dull ache where his heart would’ve been. Crumpled yellowing leaves littered his tombstone, almost as though it were a cruel joke from God that he should fall with the leaves. Arthur took a deep breath, imagining the crisp autumn air filling his lungs.
“What’s the ‘S’ stand for?”
Arthur nearly jumped, but it was hard to be scared of things once you were dead. Instead, he turned and took in the sight before him. A young boy, with black, feathered hair and silver eyes stared at him. Arthur wasn’t sure what Death looked like, but he hadn’t expected this.
“Simon.” He answered. Death cocked his head,
“And the epitaph?” The boy asked, “Why’d you choose that?”
The second session at the art building was more productive than the first session. While the first session had me planning and figuring out what I’d like to do, the second session allowed me to actually take a look at some of the materials I could use. I’ve settled on making a pop-up book of my first short story, though I found that I ran into some trouble with the paper. I thought that I would need more stable, construction-like paper, so trying to find something that worked was challenging for me. In the end, I settled on this type of red paper, with golden oval decorations on it. To me, it looked like the scales of the dragon in my story, and it honestly just looked pretty so I wanted it. Since I didn’t need anything cut by professor Gorham, I was able to get some of the basics done on my book, like cutting pages and making sure the pop-up section would work. I’ve never been great at crafting things, but I think my book is turning out okay so far.
The time spent at the art studio really helped me bring some of my ideas into focus. I had thought of a few ideas, but I hadn’t settled on anything until we had the time to plan things out. I’ve decided to make my book based on the first short story I wrote, which was about a depressed woman who starts seeing her children’s imaginations. I think I want to make the book look like a standard fantasy-esq novel, but I’m not quite sure yet. Someone at my table said it would be cool if I made a pop-up book, which makes sense with some of the themes of my story. Pop-up books are child-like and full of wonder, which is what is lacking in my character’s life. I didn’t get a lot of physical work done on the book, but I think I’m making more progress in figuring out what I’d like to do.
