This is the story of a young woman realizing that her father may not be the hero she though he was. I love the description and the voice of your story! Everything is really vivid, yet its subdued in a way to make the forest seem more like an unmapped area. You also had great pacing, as I felt that the story didn’t move too fast or slow, especially during tense moments. I really appreciated the thought that you obviously took when crafting your characters. Alyssa felt fleshed out and her backstory was explained really well. Alyssa’s relationship with her father was nice, but I wish we could’ve had more dialogue between them. I have a few questions/suggestions. You mention that the Service hired her, but what exactly does she do? Why is the service targeted by her father’s militia? While I love the beginning of the story, I feel like the plot/tension really begins when she meets with her ‘uncles’. It’s a little unsatisfying to not get answers about what these men are doing at Alyssa’s job. I think a good way to sum up the suggestions would be to this: Flesh out the motivations of Alyssa and the militia.